BABIES vs. FOOTBALL SEASON

By mark rogers
July 10, 2009

So I've been kind of busy the last week learning how to take care of a newborn baby. My daughter was born last Thursday at 5:05 PM.

Very exciting and life changing, yes...but my main concern about being a dad isn't lack of sleep, lack of disposable income or lack of sanity. It's the upcoming college football season.

Will my daughter like watching football games?

Will she be a Texas Tech or Boise State fan?

What if she is in favor of a playoff?

How could I love a child if she doesn't want to learn all the Heisman Trophy winners before she learns the alphabet?

These are my concerns...

And now, as any good college football fan and dad would do, I must come up with a strategy to make sure my daughter is molded into a competent and intelligent college football fan.

I must first introduce her to the rich and epic history of college football...from the first Harvard/Yale games to the legalization of the forward pass to Ryan Leaf.

I must then teach her the habit of sitting in one place from 9 AM to midnight on Saturdays in the fall...only getting up to eat and visit the restroom...never at the same time (which is actually the most efficient way to go).

As my father did for me, I must feed her a wide variety and flavors of chips and dips throughout the day.

I must teach her all the words to all the best fight songs.

I must show her the correct ways and exact times to yell at the TV...never too loud...never too obscene.

But before I do (or am able to do) any of this, there's one major battle I'll have to fight and ultimately win...

...the battle of the Barbie.

If she is more in to dolls than Linebackers, more in to purple than burnt orange, more in to fashion than ferocity...I'm in big trouble.

Of course if she's in to dolls, I'll show her Brady Quinn and Mark Sanchez.

If she's in to purple, there's always TCU and Washington.

If she's in to fashion, I'll give her Oregon.

I'll have an answer for everything...as long as my wife lets me speak.

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