Coin Operated Gold
Bet you want to do some laundry now. Everybody knows that nothing
ropes business in like a new big 75-pound washer. In all seriousness, though, you'd
have to be a real laundromat aficionado to fully understand the impact of a 75 pound washer when reading the sign while driving home from McDonald's.
Makes me wonder if they only bought two as a loss leader: Get patrons in the door, then they have to use whatever machine is open if the new ones are taken. It reminds me of when I was in junior high and I heard about the new controversial, bloody arcade game Mortal Kombat. Of course I wanted to play it, but by the time got to an arcade, there would be a line of players 6 deep with only 90 minutes before my dad picked me up. So I would end up playing pinball or an oldie like Centipede. Lame.
After reading this sign the first time, my first thought
was, "What the heck? That's wacky so I'm taking a picture of that." As I examined the photo
more, it occurred to me that a 75-pound washer would be personally significant to me if I ever
used the laundromat with regularity. If I frequented a laundromat, I
might actually check out the load capacities, time machines individually for speed and efficiency,
and evaluate each machine for quality. I might then keep this research secret to increase the chances that my fast machine would be available when I arrive. And I guarantee I would
know the difference between a 60 pound washer and a 75 pound washer. In fact, if I used the laundromat, I bet would have pulled over the first time I saw the sign to make sure I read it correctly. Then I would point at it out of my car window and glare at my loving wife, and say with much gusto, "That Just Happened." Then I would wait for her to acknowledge that this is very important information. Then with a satisfied grin I would put my hand back in the car, pull back into traffic safely, and go home looking for dirty clothes.
So I commend you, Glisan Sunshine Center, for catering to your customers and knowing what they are looking for. And though I have a washer and dryer at home, I'll definitely come over as soon as you put Mortal Kombat arcade game in for me to play during wash cycles.
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