Barbie and Ken voted off "Dancing"; Himalayas in an uproar
By Erin Steele
April 5, 2007
I know "Dancing with the Stars" is a popular show, but I never knew how popular until a Google search revealed that Former Miss USA Shandi Finnessey and her poor-man's-Richard-Grieco-looking partner getting booted off the program is so important even the Himalayan Times (the leading English daily in Nepal) carried the story.
This revelation made me envision a sherpa paperboy who climbs the mountain each day to deliver news about "American Idol" and Drew Barrymore and Nicole Richie, and everyone on the mountain dreams of how one day they could move to the United States, where even someone as untalented as Sanjaya Malakar can be famous.
And it makes me wonder if people think the U.S. is like a big musical, where everyone sings and dances, even if they only have one leg or happen to be the president's evil rapping sidekick. (Isn't it amazing how Rove makes Tom Cruise's dance of shame look good by comparison? Scientologists everywhere bless you, KKKarl.)
Still, I guess the news of a giant blonde beauty queen not winning something in this country is fairly unexpected. Maybe too many dudes assumed her name was Boobs McJiggle, and when they didn't hear that option on the voting menu, just hung up and went back to watching old episodes of "Baywatch" or whatever guys watch when they aren't watching ESPN or the History Channel or that show where the dude teaches you how to survive in the wilderness with nothing but a toothpick and a wish (and a cameraman, apparently).
Anyway, I bid Shandi a fond adieu, but as I mentioned last week, I didn't really want them to keep her around. As I also predicted last week, Billy Ray Cyrus made a completely unfunny joke out of his only hit song, braying that the dancing has given him "an achy, breaky butt," and thereby cementing his status as the single most mentally-challenged country musician outside of Toby Keith (if you happen to be a Toby Keith fan and am totally offended by that statement, let's just agree to disagree. Because you will never convince me his lyrics aren't written by a second grader.)
I know it's kind of early to start betting on winners, but I kind of hope Joey FatOne wins, because unless you're gay or Justin Timberlake, former N'Syncers just don't get any love. And I think it's time for the FatOne to shine. I'm pretty sure the Himalayas would agree.
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