Results tagged “So You Think You Can Speak English” from 2008 Summer Olympics blog

I went to buy a new pair of Shaq's Li Ning sneakers today down on Wangfujing.  Their three-level store is pretty impressive, with roaming salesmen who actually speak a bit of English.  But when I approached the counter to make my purchases, I ran into a bit of trouble.

See, on the back of my credit card, instead of signing my name, I've written the words "Ask for I.D."  It's supposed to be effective at stopping card theft, but only when the cashier bothers to check it (and in the States, that happens far too infrequently).  But the Chinese are quite diligent about matching the signature on the card to the one on the receipt.

So I signed the receipt as usual, and then the cashier tried to match up my signature to the words "Ask for I.D."  The two really don't look much alike.  I explained to her the situation and showed her my driver's license, which carries my signature.  That didn't seem to help.

She called over a salesperson who explained in English, "She wants you to sign like it says on the card."  I explained again that what was on the card was not my signature.  He relayed this to the cashier, and she shook her head.  "Yes," he said, "but please, just sign like it says on the card."

Somewhat bewildered, I crossed out my signature and wrote, in block letters, "Ask for I.D." on the receipt.

"Okay?" I asked the cashier.

"Yes, okay," she said.

I am helpless.  I am powerless.  I can barely use the semi-phonetical pronunciation guide in the back of one of my Beijing travel books (I haven't gotten a handle on the four tones for each character yet).

Such are my thoughts on a typical day here, living as a non-Mandarin speaker.  In day-to-day situations, without a translator nearby, I'm basically at the whim of English-speaking hotel front desk employees around town to help me get by.

The only thing that's slightly reassuring in these situations is that there are thousands of people around town like me, surviving by pointing and nodding.

Now, I hadn't been a true third party to the ridiculousness of a conversation between an English speaker and a quasi-English speaker until Friday, when on a BOCOG-sponsored media tour, I witnessed the following scene.  Your key players: a translator, two journalists from state-sponsored CCTV and an American university professor.  The text, after the jump:

The history is out there already; you're only a Google search away from China's record with human rights or their past with Tibet or Japan.  I don't think this is the right forum for me to opine on any of those topics, but here's what I'm sure of: when it comes to talking about the past, the Chinese are taking a non-confrontational approach this summer.

Take a look at this: like our last edition of So You Think You Can Speak English?, this conversation is taken from a magazine sent out to Chinese volunteers for these Olympic Games.  The last two lines really say everything about the way this nation is prepping for Westerners. As was the case with our previous installment, this text, titled, "Agreement and Disagreement," was not edited in any way.  Click on the image at right for the full scan of the text.

The full text, after the jump:

There's an old Steve Martin line I've always liked about traveling overseas.  "You never really appreciate your own language," he said, "until you go to a country that doesn't have the courtesy to speak English."

Around Beijing, the language barrier is remarkable (I've already touched on this briefly), but I can't say they're not trying.  The Olympic committee is making an especially strong effort to educate their Chinese volunteers in the quirks of English.  So in tandem with a local newspaper, Beijing Today, they've been sending out monthly magazines to Olympic volunteers with a feature they're calling, "At The English Club."  In our first edition of So You Think You Can Speak English?, I've gotten my hands on an except from one of the magazines.