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The Bringer of Death
July 31, 2006I have won.
I have defeated the bees.
There may be a few stragglers to come out of the air conditioning vents in the coming days...but nothing like it was a week ago.
The bee death total stands at 275
I even went so far as to abandon my usual method of death in favor of something that took a little longer today.
Drowning. There was a bee in my bathroom sink. I pinned him with the drain plug and filled it with water. I know, that's horrible...blah blah blah.
You have no idea what it's been like the last 2 weeks. Afraid of walking around in the dark for fear of stepping on a bee.
That would hurt a lot, a bee sting on the bottom of my foot. I'm pretty sure that would ruin my day. Even my girlfriend steps around gingerly, even in her own house...worried that there's a bee underfoot.
There won't be the daily onslaught of 25-40 bees inside my apartment any more. They know what awaits them. If they're smart, they'll buzz around and tell all their friends:
"There he is...the bringer of death. Bee-ware....BEE-WARE!!!!!!"
Posted by Jason Palmer at 9:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)
Comments
If the U.N. were involved the issue of proportionate response would definitely be an issue! Terrorist bees!!
Love the shirt, Jason!
