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My picture is on a bathroom wall?

My wife and I were eating queso and drinking beer in the On the Border bar last night.
Each time our waiter walked by our booth, he had this puzzling expression on his face.
I figured he was either constipated or confused.

Honestly, I have seen that same confused expression many times over the year.
Someone recognizes my face but just can't remember where he or she has seen it before.

I keep waiting for them to ask: "Excuse me, sir, but are you Brad Pitt?"
But they never do.

Finally, my waiter stopped at the booth and pointed his finger at me.
"Now I know," he said. "I finally figured it out -- Nick of Time."

Then came the weird part.
He said: "I've been looking at your picture in the restroom."

"Oh," I joked. "You must be a Republican."

I remember looking at pictures in the bathroom when I was a young boy.
Playboy. OK -- I confess -- even National Geographic.
And I was not looking at pictures of some old bald sports writer.

The waiter reminded me the sports page of the newspaper hangs by the urinal in the men's room at On the Border.
Why they do this, I don't know.
Who has time to read "Nick of Time" while taking a piss?

It is bad enough for people in my profession to know that a big portion of our audience read our prose while sitting on the toilet.
Now, men are reading us while they stand and pee.

Posted by at 7:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)